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Baby Steps: Having the Child I Always Wanted (Just Not as I Expected)

The Object of My Conception: Motherhood, IVF, and What It Really Means to Be a Woman

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Baby Steps: Having the Child I Always Wanted (Just Not as I Expected)

The Object of My Conception: Motherhood, IVF, and What It Really Means to Be a Woman

4.85 26,260 ratings · 9,229 reviews
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Overview: From the introduction:�You’re going to write about infertility? You’re going to write about IVF? About us?” he said. He practically cupped his hands over his crotch, like I was going to kick him in the balls.�What’s your problem?” I said. I wanted to blog about it. I wanted to get it off my chest. Too many women in Hollywood hide the fact that they can’t have a baby the so-called normal way, and I didn’t want to be one of them. �It’s my body that’s broken, not yours,” I said.�The world doesn’t need to know about this,” he said. Was he blushing? I suppose he had a say. He was the one I was trying to have a baby with. I was planning to marry him. But I also believed he was wrong.�Maybe the world does.”My mother was such a role-model of truth-telling that I’ve always known I would say and do whatever I needed to say and do. Whether it was pursuing what I was passionate about when I got out of college (acting) or revealing my big dark secret lurking in the closet to hundreds of thousands of strangers (infertility), I don’t know how to hide the truth. I don’t know how to keep my mouth shut. I don’t know how not to say to other women, �What do you think about this?”Part of being a strong woman is telling the goddamn truth. That’s how you are true to yourself, and that’s how you can be there for other women, too. That’s why I’m writing this book. Women need to talk to each other. We need to share our stories. This is what makes a community. This is what holds us up. I believe this so strongly that I’m willing to share my very private story, to be vulnerable in front of you—so you can know that you are not alone.Infertility can feel like a dirty little secret. What’s the opposite of emasculated? De-feminized? Whatever that word is, that’s how infertility can make a woman feel. If you can’t have a baby, especially if your heart aches to be a mother, if you’re so baby crazy you can’t think of anything else, infertility feels like a punch in the stomach, a negation of your power. What good are you? You can begin to feel like you are nothing, even if you keep on keeping on with your regular life, never revealing to anyone your private shame. Or, you get proactive--we go to such extreme lengths, financial and emotional and physical and intellectual, to have a baby, using every bit of modern technology we can get our hands on. Sometimes it works. Sometimes it doesn’t.I want to explore what all of this means. I want to ask the questions you might think to yourself, in your most dark and secret hour, but which you are afraid to voice. Are you a woman? Do you deserve a baby? Do you really even want a baby? And if you do, what price will you be willing to pay to get one?In this book, I want to talk about these questions, in my own life and in yours. I want to talk about some of women’s most terrifying and heartbreaking moments-- and some of our shallower, vainer moments, too. They all make us who we are. From the day I lost my mother to the day I had my daughter and everything in between, let’s just put it all out there, shall we? Let’s just say what we need to say.

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Language En-US
Published April 30, 2013
ISBN 15843127
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Elisabeth Rohm
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Elisabeth Rohm is a writer and avid reader based in the Pacific Northwest. Before pursuing writing full-time, they spent over a decade working in education. When not working on their next book, Elisabeth Rohm can usually be found hiking with their dog or trying out new coffee shops in their neighborhood.

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Richard Lewis
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A highly sophisticated read. It held my rapt attention, even when certain twists were telegraphed. I would highly recommend this to discerning readers.
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Absolutely brilliant. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. I am now a lifelong fan of this author.
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Absolutely brilliant. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre.
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Excellent, though slightly flawed. A brilliant concept executed with flair. Just a few pacing choices I would change. Quite impressive overall.
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Took a moment to build, but the payoff was spectacular. It held my rapt attention, even when certain twists were telegraphed. Quite impressive overall.
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Took a moment to build, but the payoff was spectacular. It held my rapt attention, even when certain twists were telegraphed. A very distinguished novel.
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I thoroughly enjoyed the elegance of it. The protagonist was compelling, though some subplots felt slightly overshadowed. A very distinguished novel.
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Ashley Lewis July 25, 2025
Absolutely brilliant. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. Worth every moment spent reading.
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Laura Young February 25, 2025
Such a rich narrative. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. A true literary gem.
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Absolutely brilliant. The pacing was impeccable and the characters felt incredibly authentic. I was completely immersed. I am now a lifelong fan of this author.
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Exceeded all my expectations. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre.
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Thomas Baker January 20, 2024
Such a rich narrative. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. A true literary gem.
Daniel Jackson
Daniel Jackson January 12, 2025
Masterpiece from start to finish. The pacing was impeccable and the characters felt incredibly authentic. I was completely immersed. Worth every moment spent reading.
Betty Robinson
Betty Robinson November 09, 2025
Exceeded all my expectations. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. An effortless 5 stars.
Eric Hall
Eric Hall July 05, 2025
Honestly one of the most premium reading experiences lately. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. I am now a lifelong fan of this author.
Patricia Turner
Patricia Turner December 05, 2024
A profoundly satisfying read. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre.
Amanda Martin
Amanda Martin July 19, 2025
Such a rich narrative. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece.
Donald Reyes
Donald Reyes June 14, 2025
A highly sophisticated read. It held my rapt attention, even when certain twists were telegraphed. I would highly recommend this to discerning readers.
Donald Green
Donald Green March 12, 2024
It was adequate. The prose was competent, yet the characters lacked the depth I usually seek. A fair 3 stars.
Donna Moore
Donna Moore March 28, 2024
Excellent, though slightly flawed. A brilliant concept executed with flair. Just a few pacing choices I would change. A very distinguished novel.
Robert Hill
Robert Hill September 13, 2025
Excellent, though slightly flawed. The protagonist was compelling, though some subplots felt slightly overshadowed. I would highly recommend this to discerning readers.
Mark Harris
Mark Harris October 17, 2024
A profoundly satisfying read. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. I am now a lifelong fan of this author.
Jacob Thomas
Jacob Thomas July 25, 2024
Such a rich narrative. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. Worth every moment spent reading.
Cynthia Clark
Cynthia Clark August 14, 2024
Masterpiece from start to finish. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. An effortless 5 stars.
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